Re-CONCIEVE Your Self
Dear Friends,
I hope that the seriousness of this letter doesn’t scare you. I’ve been trying to write a light and lively essay and the stars just won’t aligned.
Instead I have been sitting with what it means to heal in times of collective instability. It is a different challenge that feels more like “whole-ing” than healing.
When I think of what is happening to some of our most vulnerable here in the US and around the globe, the unnecessary suffering makes me crazy. I want to wrap all of us in a giant hug and bravely hold the line. I imagine myself as the healer version of Joan of Arc staving off the craniosacral equivalent of the Hundred Years’ War.
And at the same time, the ungenerous cowardly nature of those in power makes me want to bury my head in the sand, ignore my responsibilities, and savor the ebbing summer.
Ping ponging between these two extremes has locked me up creatively. I don’t want to burden you with my personal politics, nor do I want to concede my freedom and joy which feels even more precious and rebellious.
After weeks of reflection, I’ve come to understand that healing in itself is an act of resistance—one that I will continue to undertake no matter what the circumstances. I will let the quality of the work morph through heightened urgency and deepen through communal roots.
Healing in unstable circumstances, especially in community, helps us co-regulate our nervous systems and remember who we really are. We are inextinguishable, infinitely renewable, and wholly interconnected. As we re-integrate, we resist the forces that prey on our vulnerabilities and disengage from those who encourage us to demean others, horde resources, and hide our gifts.
When we are overwhelmed, we long to go back to better times. Something I know from the depth of my bones is that healing is not nostalgic. It is a present tense experience that requires RE-CONCEPTION. We re-conceive or re-birth ourselves through the process of orienting toward self love, dignity, and open awareness. We cut through outer noise and attune to our steadiest, fearless inner selves.
To re-conceive is an act of self love. We are paying attention to ourselves with renewed depth and curiosity. If the phrase self-love feels cringy, it might be because we’re not used to engaging with our inner monologue from a sense of spaciousness. We might be accustomed to hyperfocus and self scrutiny which is different from curiosity, inquiry, dialogue, and acceptance.
When we start to apply compassionate engagement to our inner voice, we begin to sense our inherent worth. We understand that being is the goal, and being together is the context. From this state, we cultivate dignity and extend a net of safety and trust to our wider community.
Dignity consciousness arises in the collective when self worth intersects with open awareness. Open awareness is the space that surrounds our tendency toward dualistic narratives. In this expansive shared consciousness, we intuitively understands that sickness and health coexist. In fact they are interdependent.
Healing happens when we experience this truth and can let go of nostalgia. Our curiosity, inquiry, dialogue and acceptance re-orients us to the possibility of the present. In this space, we reorganize, release and re-establish who we are.
After years of orienting toward self-love, dignity, and open awareness, I know with certainty that this is what we are designed to do. All healing crises are epicenters inviting us to re-member who we really are and to re-conceive how we share the fullness of our present self with the world.
This is real POWER—the kind that values creation over corruption.
As I wind down the summer, I very much look forward to being and being together with you. i am working to bring healing in many forms into our community.
With folded palms,